Edit
You messed up. You really stepped in it this time. You’ve done something that will definitely have consequences for you and your relationship. How do you tell your partner you’ve had an affair?

Whether it was a drunken mistake or a conscious decision you made, there’s no getting around the fact that your partner will feel crushed, or furious. They may end the relationship over this.

That’s terrifying.

We all have that instinct, even if just for a moment. I need to keep it to myself. If I tell them, it will crush them. They’ll never get over it. They’ll never forgive me. I just can’t hurt them like that. If I tell, then I’m taking my shame and embarrassment and stress and I’m turning it into their pain. If I don’t, maybe they’ll never find out. Maybe I can take this to the grave.

Can you make a case for silence?